If you’re looking for a break from all the Zoom happy hours, parties, and quizzes, it means you already had too much. But, yeah, we know it’s hard to come up with excuses when everyone knows you’re at home and have virtually nowhere else to go.
Writers of Twitter – can you put your creative talents into thinking of excuses for the rest of us to avoid tedious meetings and unwelcome zoom drinks? Old favourites like “I’m sorry, I’ve got a thing that night” and “I’m not in London then, I’m afraid” no longer cut any ice.
— David QC (@DavidMuttering) March 31, 2020
So, of course, we reached out to the internet (Twitter, to be more precise) trying to find the best advices (excuses) that could help you skip your next online gathering HR has planned. After all, we’re all in this together, and if it works for one of us, it could work for all of us. So, here we go:
1. The Straight Forward One
I have another call now. Actually true – three solid days of it this week.
— Mrs Macsee (@JacqMcCallum) March 21, 2020
2. The Easy One
My WiFi is down (sent by text)
— Nick Tesco (@TheNickTesco) March 31, 2020
3. The Desperate One
“My internet is patchy”; “I tried clippering my hair and the result was awful so I can’t speak for at least a month”; “I haven’t told you this because it’s technically illegal but I have a pet Capucin monkey, Marcel, and he escaped today – nightmare. Long story short, can’t talk”
— James McNamara (@jamesmcnamara27) March 31, 2020
4. The Blame It On The Kids One
“My kids are on Minecraft, PS4 and Skype simultaneously and the WiFi is maxed out.”
— Colm Nugent (@Wigapedia) March 31, 2020
5. The Good Comrad One
I’m saving bandwidth for keyworkers.
— suesspicious minds (@suesspiciousmin) March 31, 2020
- I’ve got a headache from too much screen time;
- I’m having a FaceTime date;
- It’s my turn to tidy the house;
- Connect 1hr later and pretend you were messed up with the timezone;
- Blame your pets (say your dog is using the internet or that it’s their birthday dinner – we attached some pics so you can prove it).